50 questions to ask your grandparents

A grandparent carries most of a century inside them — a whole vanished world of costs and customs and near-misses that no history book will ever record. Ask, and you become the only person who ever wrote it down. Here are fifty questions to start.

Grandparents are often happier talking about the far past than the near one, so lead with the world they grew up in. And go slowly — one question is a doorway, not a form to fill in.

The world you grew up in

• What year were you born, and what was the world like then?
• What did your town or village look like?
• What did families not have then that everyone has now?
• How did news reach you?
• What did everyday things cost — and was that a lot?
• What was the biggest event that happened in your lifetime?
• What invention amazed you most when it arrived?
• How did people get around?
• What did children do all day without screens?
• What's something everyone did then that no one does now?

Your family & childhood

• What were your parents' names, and what were they like?
• How many brothers and sisters did you have?
• Who were you closest to growing up?
• What chores did you have as a child?
• How did your family celebrate?
• What food did your mother or grandmother make best?
• What was school like for you?
• How far did you travel to get there?
• What did you get in trouble for?
• What did your family believe was most important?

Youth, love & marriage

• What did you do for fun as a young person?
• What was the fashion when you were young?
• How did you meet your husband or wife?
• What was courting like in your day?
• What was your wedding like?
• Where did you live when you were first married?
• What was the hardest year of your marriage — and how did you get through it?
• What did you learn about love that you'd pass on?
• What did you and your spouse laugh about?
• What do you miss most about those early years?

Work & the wider world

• What was your first job, and what did it pay?
• What work did you do most of your life?
• Did you live through any war or great upheaval?
• Did you ever move far from home? What was that like?
• What was the proudest achievement of your working life?
• Who did you look up to?
• What was the hardest work you ever did?
• What did you dream of that you never got to do?

Wisdom & legacy

• What's the best decision you ever made?
• What's a mistake that taught you the most?
• What are you most proud of?
• What do you know now that you wish you'd known at twenty?
• What's changed for the better in your lifetime — and for the worse?
• What do you want your grandchildren to remember about you?
• What tradition do you hope we keep?
• What's your happiest memory?
• What advice would you give me for my life?
• If you could tell your great-grandchildren one thing, what would it be?

If distance makes this hard — if your grandparent is in another city or another country — you're not alone, and it's still very possible. Here's how to stay close to family who live far away, and 101 more questions for your parents.